When the relationships are turbulent and heading to their logical end, you may wonder how you got to such outcomes. But instead of blaming your partner, your relatives or in-laws, or daily challenges for bringing you apart, you should look closely at your actions and mistakes. You may have created the primary reason for your marriage to fail without even suspecting anything.
Learn the simplest ways how to stop sabotaging relationships and change your ones for the better.
1. Stop Overthinking
The urge to search for New York uncontested divorce forms to put your troublesome marriage to the end often comes from overthinking. There may be many ambiguous situations in your marital life where you may get suspicious of your partner.
The moment you hesitate about your spouse’s loyalty, sincerity, love, and so on, you’d better voice your concerns. If you decide to remain silent but keep on thinking of the issue that maybe doesn’t exist at all, certain troubles may arise. Your task is to choose communication as a primary solution for the situation. This way, you won’t be left alone with your thoughts and sometimes imaginations about your relationships. But you will clear out what is true and cope with the troubles together if there are some.
2. Share the Responsibility
Another trick to prevent self-sabotaging relationships is to stop blaming each other when you face any daily or serious challenges. If you have any mutual concerns or start a conflict, both of you are responsible for it, meaning that there is not a partner but a couple to blame.
Instead of criticizing each other, it is better to unite your effort and ideas and cope with any issue together. Such an approach will only strengthen your relationships rather than ruin them.
3. Support Each Other
Mutual support is one more cornerstone of steady and lasting relationships. If you cannot recall the times you share the joy of your partner’s success with them or are there by their side at moments of mischief and failure, you are probably sabotaging your relationships.
Remember that you are not only romantic partners but should also be close friends. Your spouse needs you to listen to them, come up with ideas or advice, be present at vital events, etc. as well as you do. If you manage to build up a firm friendship, your marriage is saved for sure.
4. Be Open to Communication
If you lack time for morning coffee chats, vital-issue discussions, or sincere pre-bed talks, you have an answer to why am I sabotaging my relationship question. Communication is what helps to create any social connections and maintain them. Marriage is a bond that needs great input. If you don’t feel comfortable communicating with your spouse, why are you married at all?
Providing that you have communication hurdles, take little steps as soon as possible to change the situation for the better. Begin with getting up earlier to share the news over the morning coffee, watch films together to have mutual topics for discussion, get more open about personal issues and be ready to listen to your partner’s concerns, too. In the end, you can visit a family therapist to fix your communication issues with the help of a professional.
5. Avoid Insincerity
The best thing you can do to ruin your marriage is to pretend. Pretend that you have no marital issues. Pretend to be a different person. Pretend to feel in a different way than you do. Insincerity will make neither you nor your partner happy. Eventually, you will lose the trust in each other and your relationships, get tired of living in the lies, and split up.
Insincerity is well cured with openness and honesty to each other. Learn to tell the truth, talk about your feelings, and discuss your concerns or dissatisfaction. This will give you time and space to cope with the troubles together until they get too complicated and your marriage falls apart.
6. Let Go of the Past
It often happens that your past is responsible for sabotaging your relationship and your future. You hold a grudge against each other, you are jealous of your spouse’s ex, and you cannot trust your spouse fully due to their past deeds. Although everything mentioned is already in the past, it continues rotting your present and future.
There is no other way out but to let go of the past. If you still have some related concerns. Discuss them openly with your partner. It can help you when your spouse may also not show his emotions. It gives him a chance to practice opening up with you. Learn your lesson, and move on to a happy future together.
7. Prioritize Your Relationships
You may have a super busy life but if you cannot find enough time and effort to invest in your relationships, you will doom them to failure. No matter how important your job is to you, how you like spending time with your friends, and how much you want to waste on self-development, if your marriage is important to you, you have to treat it accordingly. If you don’t commit to your marriage much, you will most probably sabotage it and lead your relationship to the end eventually.